Hormones!

There is so much people tell me about being pregnant and what to expect. I did not hear much about hormones, however. Am I in store for 40 weeks of emotional havoc????? This is like constant p.m.s.! I have been feeling particularly insecure, sensitive, TIRED, headachy, forgetful, bloated, and downright emotional lately. It's like I find myself having a larger-than-called-for reaction to certain situations, etc. I am aware that I am over-reacting (most of this over-reacting is internal, in the way I feel emotionally) and I am aware that logic exists somewhere within me, but it must have gotten lost somewhere, as though it got sucked into some black hole, because no matter how hard I try, the emotions over-rule. It can be very exhausting. Because let's face it, I am someone who constantly thinks and second-guesses myself anyway, add this to the mix. Wow!

This being said, I am thoroughly enjoying this miracle which is happening inside me. I love to read books and web-sites and imagine just exactly what is happening to my little fetus. Today I am 6 weeks pregnant. Each and every day I am so grateful that another day has passed without problems. I really want this to go well and be a healthy and full-term pregnancy. (I know, who doesn't want that?) I am still so excited! I could just pinch myself (the self-destructiveness in me, again!) If only I had started this blog sooner, then you could really hear how challenging the last 8 months have been for my husband and me. Truth be told, it's better for us all that now I can write about how wonderful the next 34 weeks will be!

On another note, I got my new car yesterday. I really stressed a lot over which car to get. Why are decisions like that so hard for me? I did my research, checked our budget, involved my husband, shopped around. It came down to two different cars and I liked them both. I guess I had to feel frusturated enough between vacillating back and forth before I could make a decision. I love my new car, and I am really happy with the choice I made. No regrets. I have heard from more than a couple of people that I "should be proud of myself" for shopping around so much and doing my research. What these people don't realize is that I teeter on the line between thorough and obsessive. Well, the car purchase is one thing crossed off my to-do list. Now, to prepare for the party! It's always something with me!